Tuesday 17 February 2009

Of drunken ministers and wayward ways

Japanese finance minister has recently resigned due to a gaffe wherein he reportedly appeared drunk at a press conference in Italy. Now that is some feat. It’s probably safer to walk into a cage of lions than to go to a press conference attended by blood thirsty reporters. The minister is probably cursing his luck, c’mon if this was vodka high Yeltsin signing some important decrees giving away resources to oligarchs, he would’ve been hailed a supporter of “Freedom”. Alas he is from Japan, where even if drinking is a huge problem (or a boon – depends on your perspective), general sense of propriety is very high.

Now that brings us to our Matribhoomi. We all know the general sense of propriety is so high that hurling abuses and chairs in parliaments/legislative assemblies are accepted forms of protest. Given the fact that democracy is so nascent and fragile, our means of protest have to be violent “to make the deaf hear”.

Going forward I believe that a reservation system should be enforced for Pehelwans, which will allow both ruling and opposition parties to make a hugely positive impact. See the benefits.
Furniture will be regularly broken – Creating a regular need for wood and carpenters. What better way of increasing public spending in the era of global slowdown
Less Security required for Parliament – With professional pehelwans, terrorists would be scared of attacking.
Younger Parliamentarians – with the need for agile and strong parliamentarians, the old and weak will automatically be culled.

Now I am getting too carried away, coming back to the poor Japanese minister, I believe he has every right to take recourse to some chair hurling at the journalists, which he should however learn from our MLAs. What if he appeared a little drunk and muddled his speech – he didn’t call Afghanistan Iraq like George W. Bush neither did he justify rape as Burlusconi.

Japan should increase bilateral contacts with India whereby while Japanese public may come for some Buddhist pilgrimages their politicians should come for pehelwan commando training to India with a basic course at Orissa assembly and an intensive degree at the UP assembly. Now that is a novel way to make our legislators contribute to the exchequer too…

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